Making Sacrifices for your Children

First, an update on "Nursapalooza!"... we went to our awesome family doc yesterday and weighed Nathan. He gained 5 oz in just one week! So "Nursapalooza!" is working. I'm so thankful. I've always read and encouraged others that you can increase your milk supply simply by increasing nursing frequency, because of the supply/demand principle of breastfeeding... but experiencing it myself was required a deeper level of faith in the process. It was really incredible to experience it firsthand.

"Nursapalooza!" is requiring a lot of sacrifice on my part. (I'm nursing more often and longer than previously, etc. so my time is eaten up. For one thing, if I get to finish this post, I probably won't edit it!) I don't say that to brag about sacrificing, "whoa is me! aren't i so great?!" but more to bring up the idea of sacrificing for our children.

Isn't it difficult to know when, how, and to what extent to sacrifice for them? When is sacrificing for them a place for us to grow in our character, part of our responsibility as parents, a way to love them in such a lavish way as to reflect --even just a little-- God's lavish love for them?

And when is sacrificing for them unhealthy for us? When does it become a way for us to find our value and identity to unhealthy extremes?

Lately I've been sensing the need to sink into this mommying thing more and more. I'm doing a lot of "sacrificing" as it would appear... but is it really even "sacrificing," I wonder? When I have sacrificed just a little smidgen for my kids, what I have gained from the experience of mothering FAR tips the scales. Abundance, joy, and deeper relationships have followed. Not that it's formulaic in any way. (This is when good editing time would be really helpful- in order o expand here... anyway...)

In addition to the everyday selfishness in my own heart, there are so many things telling me to take care of ME. Every other commercial is about a drug that claims to meet a need I didn't know I had. The radio station's call sign is "MY 103.4." My organization's web page's employee page is called "MYpage." There are places to get manicures and pedicures on every corner. I can even order my latte EXACTLY the way I want it. Etc.etc.etc. We have SO MUCH more than any other time or culture or country can offer, yet we keep longing for rest from more of these things. It's our very being to be all about ourselves. I'm definitely not saying any of those things are bad. But I'm starting to sense in my own heart when I'm hoping things will give me the rest my heart and mind and body desire. I'm sure you are following me.

And so I'm trying to find the rest in the everyday "sacrifices." And the Lord is meeting me here. Today I'm exhausted. But I look forward to being met by the Lord in the little moments with my children. In the little moments that come within the space of being in a day not too filled with things to distract me from them. In the stirring, the changing, the wiping, the tower-building, the book-reading, the putting one child down crying to chase the other, even in the redirecting, teaching, disciplining and the changing. It's in these moments I pray the Lord would give me eyes to find His rest. That I would look for Him here. That I wouldn't pray for the moments to pass or for the circumstances to change. But that I would long to be met by Him amidst the craziness, knowing having Him in ANY circumstance is a great great blessing I all to often take for granted.